2 Months Down, ?? to Go

Last week we passed the two month mark on the wait list.  Keeping track of the months has become somewhat futile though because the timeline is now so unpredictable.  For now though, we just wait and pray.

I know I have not been posting much.  It has been a rough several months for us, and I don't want to have a depressing blog.  My grandma passed away yesterday.  That's 3 parents/grandparents for us in 4 months.  I just feel kind of numb right now.  I just can't believe I won't be going to visit her again, and that I can't pick up the phone and hear the excitement in her voice when she realizes it's me on other end.  I won't hear my grandpa's stories anymore, or hear him volunteering my grandma to go pick up ice cream. :)  My kids won't get to know their grandpa either.  The oldest two will just have a few memories from the months he was sick.  I am just ready for this season to be over.  It has been too much at once. 

On a brighter note...yesterday was our anniversary.  We have been married 8 years!  We managed to get out for a date night thanks to some sweet friends that kept our kiddos for a few hours.  

1 Month Down and Some Thoughts on the Wait

Earlier this week marked one month officially on the wait list for our adoption.  As things now seem even more uncertain in the process, I don’t necessarily know if that means we are one month closer, but the month did seem to go by pretty quickly.  (By the way, the pic below is 3 years old, but I couldn't resist posting Ethan's "thumbs up" as our number one.  Was he ever really that little?!?)

I have heard a lot of people talk (and read a lot of blogs) on the subject of waiting when it comes to adoption.  The general consensus seems to be that the entire process will go according to God’s timing and His plan, therefore I should not be praying that the process goes quickly.  

I think I am gonna have to disagree on that one.  

While I 100% believe that God is sovereign and can make this adoption happen at any moment, I do not believe that it is His will that orphans remain without families while there are holdups in the process for whatever reason.  When adoptions slow down in any country, fewer children are united with loving families.  They remain in institutions or without a home altogether.  They may not get the food or medical care they need, and ultimately some of these kids will not survive.  

I was talking to a friend last weekend who runs an orphanage in Africa.  Her orphanage is probably one of the best there is, but as she herself put it, no matter how good of a job they do, “it is still an institution.  It is not a family.” 

I believe that the delays are evidence of the fallen world that we live in.  In a perfect world, children would not have to wait on paperwork to be completed before they can be held by their mother.  (Of course, in a perfect world, there wouldn’t be a need for adoption either as there would be no death, disease, poverty, or any other situation that would lead to a child being without a family.)  The fact is, our world is not as it should be...as it was created to be.  The consequences of sin are evident all around, and this process is no exception.  (By the way, I am in no way blaming any one earthly organization for the delays.  The very reason that added scrutiny is needed is because we live in a world where not everyone is looking out for the best interests of children.  Those involved are trying to determine a way to make sure these kids are kept safe.  Our battle is not against flesh and blood.)

God tells us in his Word that “all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.”  (Romans 8:28)  This does not mean that everything that happens will be good, but it does mean that He can bring about good from really crumby situations.  He will use the holdups to bring the specific child He has planned to be in our family.  He will also use those delays to teach us and grow us in ways that we never would have imagined.  He will use the delays to show us more about who He is, but I do not believe that He is the creator of the delays.  After all, “God sets the lonely in families.”  (Psalm 68:6)  

I also do know that at many points in this process, God will steer the decisions of everyone involved, and He can intervene and bring our child home tomorrow.  He sees this entire process from beginning to end, and is watching out for our kids wherever they are...because they are His kids.  He loves them more that we ever will.  My God is sovereign, powerful, and He loves us.  He wants kids to have families.  He wants us to grow in Him.  And he wants to bless us...and I can’t think of a better blessing that the precious kiddos He will put in our lives through this process.

So, I will be praying that this process moves quickly...for us, for the other families that are waiting on their kids, and especially for the sweet children that wait in orphanages around the world for their mommies and daddies to come and get them.  I will be praying that the hindrances to children being placed in loving families are removed.  I will be praying for wisdom and guidance for those who make decisions in all stages of the process.  The lives of children hang in the balance.

Longest Pregnancy Ever!

I just realized that we have officially been in this adoption process for 9 months...meaning if I was pregnant, I would be having a baby right about now.  This may be the longest pregnancy ever.  The thought is making my back ache...and I may need a foot rub.

WAIT LIST!!!

As of this week, we are officially on the wait list!!!!

I spent the earlier part of this week in Southern California for my grandfather's funeral.  We have had a rough couple of months between the passing of Jonathan's dad and my grandpa so close together, but God has given us little reminders of His goodness on the hardest days.  You may remember that our home study was finalized and we got our Gladney approval on the day Jonathan's dad passed away.  On Tuesday, I left my phone in the car during my grandpa's service.  It was a wonderful service with full military honors in recognition of his combined 41 years in the United States Air Force and California Air National Guard, but it was very hard to get through.  When I got back in the rental car to make the drive from Riverside National Cemetery back to my grandparents' house in Los Angeles, I saw the email from our caseworker letting us know that we were officially on the wait list.  The timing couldn't have been better.

So, everyone keeps asking us the same questions...how much longer does this take?  When will you have your child home?  The best answer I can give you is...I have no idea!!  A few months ago, the average wait time for a referral of a healthy infant was 8 or 9 months.  Our agency then had a 3 month hold on referrals, pushing the current wait time to about a year.  Now that they have begun issuing referrals again, the are estimating that the wait time will drop back down to what it was in a few months. There is however a bit of restructuring going on within the Ethiopia government regarding how they process adoption cases.  Depending on how that plays out, there is the potential for more delays.  The other factor that comes into play is that we are open to some special needs, which could shorten our wait depending on what the needs are of the children that come into Gladney's care and what the families ahead of us on the list are open to.  In other words, next month a child may come along that has a need that no one else ahead of us is open to, or Gladney could go 6 months or more without any special needs children coming into their care.  So, our guess is as good as yours when it comes to when we will get our referral.  Please pray for patience and sanity for me.  :)  Regardless of how long this takes though...we are one step closer!!!

Doubly Awesome Day!

Today marks 5 years since I became a mommy...which means IT'S ETHAN'S BIRTHDAY!!!!  I will have to post pictures of the occasion tomorrow since it is to early in the day.  (I still have presents to wrap and a cake to frost.)

Happy Birthday Ethan!!!!

In other incredibly exciting news...WE GOT OUR CIS APPROVAL TODAY!!!!!!  I have been eagerly checking the mail for the past five weeks waiting for it and wondering if it would even come.  The machine that took my fingerprints didn't like them, so I wasn't sure if I would have to go back to get re-fingerprinted, but apparently I don't have reject fingers!  

So, we have to go get the cover-page for the CIS approval notarized and tomorrow Jonathan is going to take it downtown himself to get it authenticated.  This will complete our dossier, and barring any unforeseen catastrophe, we should be on the waitlist by next week!!!!  

Easter 2011

We had a great Easter yesterday.  Ethan came to "big church" with us and did really well.  We then went home where their Easter baskets awaited.  (We decided to wait until after church to do the bunny stuff.)  Then, after nap time we colored eggs and watched some Veggie Tales DVDs that the bunny brought the kiddos.  It was a great Easter because Ethan is starting to grasp what Easter is all about.  

They sure were cute in all of their Easter outfits too.  I am not looking forward to the day when the boys don't want to be dressed alike anymore.

A little sibling love. :)

Maybe by next year that Easter photo will be a little more crowded.  :)  We are still waiting (im)patiently on our immigration approval, and then we will officially be on the waitlist.  

Adoption Fundraiser - Buy a Cross, Support our Adoption

In case you are unaware, my mom is super talented when it comes to all things crafty.  (Apparently not a single crafty gene was passed on to me.)  My mom has recently taken up woodworking and is making some amazing stuff!  She has decided to design something specifically to be a fundraiser for our adoption!  (I think she is a little excited about getting another grandbaby.)

She is selling these crosses here on her Etsy site.  They are $10 each, and 100% of the money from these crosses goes directly to our adoption fund!!!  If you see something else you like, be sure to mention "Adoption" and 100% will still go to the adoption fund.  There is some other cool stuff on her site, including the tree she made me for my birthday.

Also, if you live near either my mom or me, you can buy a cross directly from either of us.  She gave me a stash of them to have on hand.  :)